MASS EFFECT 2: THE SPOILER THREAD

[Abraham Smashington]

Like it says in the title, full spoilers here for people that are finishing up the game. Don't come in and get annoyed if something is spoiled for you.

So far I'm loving all of the call backs to the first one. The reporter, the undercover cop lady, etc. The prison break out with Jack was pretty bad ass as well.

[Shit Dickface]

I didn't punch the reporter in the first one because I was too much of a goody two shoes, and unfortunately I'm like a cat with a laser pointer when it comes to those goddamn interruption prompts, so imagine my surprise when I lazily squeezed the left trigger out of instinct and Shepard hauled off and slugged this chick hard enough to knock her down to the floor. She called him a son of a bitch and he quipped "I should have done that to you the FIRST time we met." It was pretty amazing.

[Abraham Smashington]

Yeah, same here. I loved that. Fuck her.

[BillyG]

Miranda grabbed my junk, but then sat down at her desk and said "Piss off, I need to work." I can't wait to haterape her.

[Abraham Smashington]

So Samara? Those are quite the set of blue titties.

[Shit Dickface]

skeeeeeeeeeeeeeet

[BillyG]

I totally got Kelly to come to dinner. They didn't show me what happened, but she commented on not being up that late since college. I'm going to assume she did a keg stand, and then I put it in das pooper.

[Captain Russ]

Now she'll feed yer fish and they won't die like the little finned fails they are when you leave for a business trip.

Also: space hamsters.

[Captain Russ]

Gonna beat it again today as a renegade. A rebel without a social life.

Anyway, gonna see what happens with Martin Sheen when you choose to keep King Shit of Fuck Mountain around. I hope for a congratulatory speech and a Zeej, even though 2nd Shep has ladybits.

I fucking love this game.

[Shit Dickface]

looooool Conrad Werner

[Captain Russ]

He's so pathetic, yet so hilarious.

I'd love to have some sort of side mission where he has to implicate a volus in stealing his Official Commander Shepard pillowcases or some shit.

I bet his galactic treehouse is awesome.

[Captain Russ]

Best NPC: the volus that will end up saving the fucking day in ME3, the drugged up bravado-spewing mercenary midget of mayhem himself, the violator of the vending machine, Niftu Cal.

[Abraham Smashington]

I fucking loved pulling the renegade move during Miranda's loyalty mission. Snapping that dude's neck and rocking his fucking team was awesome.

[Captain Russ]

I fucking loved pulling the renegade move during Miranda's loyalty mission. Snapping that dude's neck and rocking his fucking team was awesome.

Those sorts of "fuck you, pay me" moments with the renegade QTEs are incredibly fun.

This second time around, I got into it enough to pull the dumb "Sparta" line.

I instantly felt the pang of stupidity, and subsequently drowned those thoughts with cheap vodka.

[Shit Dickface]

I fucking loved pulling the renegade move during Miranda's loyalty mission. Snapping that dude's neck and rocking his fucking team was awesome.

I pumped my fist in the air when that happened. So great. Also, kicking the mercenary out of the plate-glass window of the highrise.