World Cup South Africa- SPOILER TAG OUTCOMES PLZ

[Captain Russ]

Pretty good match going on.

Muller was a reserve last year. Now he's in contention for the Golden Boot.

Hope for Ze Germans to make one last charge toward a goalacaust, but the booing of Forlan's a little uncalled for, Africa. Tighten up.

[Captain Russ]

Great match, Forlan was awesome, and I wish he'd have put that ball in the back of the net at the end to keep it going.

In other news, a footballer (Dutchman Sneijder) is a massive twat*.

*British version

...GO SPAIN?

[Captain Russ]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

De Jong is the new Karate Kid.

Shoulda been a red for that. Jeebus.

[Captain Russ]

O FUCKING LÉ

[Captain Russ]

Also: hindsight jumpkick .gif

(Webb's card shoulda been red as a baboon's ass)

[Captain Russ]

Glad Forlán got the Golden Ball. He deserved it. Had a great tournament and put in some insanely impressive finishes.

And Müller got the Boot. Can't wait to see him again in four years. Hell of a Cup for him.

This was a fun time, and I think I'm gonna have to put cashmonies down for a few matches and a flight to Brasil in 2014. SRSLY

Too bad there's a lull in activity (besides the MLS). But Premiere is back up in August, so that'll be awesome.

WOO KICKBALL

[Ed Hocken]

The fact Argentina didn't win means that we're all winners.

Plus that jump kick to the sternum was horrifying.

[Captain Russ]

Argies were a bunch of diving pricks in the end, but I still hold out hope Maradona won't return to the wilderness following his team's shitty showing in the quarter-finals.

I still have admiration for Argentine Santa.

[Ed Hocken]

That match was pure WWI: Evenly matched, dirty tactics, attrition, not much happening for a long long time, then jackpot.

[Captain Russ]

I jumped a good five or six feet when that Krillin-looking* fucker finally fired the ball into the corner of the net. Almost punched the ceiling.

Villa was all sorts of Bizarro Villa today. What the fuck was he thinking with that wide-open chance to finish in the first half? Same with Ramos' header on that corner. Some really incredible chances there for Spain.

On the other side of the pitch, Robben totally fucked up that breakaway (twice) and pissed and moaned for the rest of the match. I felt bad for him until he kept the Whine-Train running.

*Iniesta looks like Krillin. GIRL YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE

[Captain Russ]

Soooooooon...

[Ed Hocken]

Pff, this is Brasil we're talking about. That's nothing new.

[Captain Russ]

STOP TAKING THE FUCKING WIND OUTTA THE SAILS OF THE PARTY BOAT

[Ed Hocken]

I'LL DO AS I DAMN WELL PLEASE!

[Captain Russ]

Fine. Party Boat's stranded in the middle of the fucking Atlantic now.



LOOK WHAT YOU DID YOU LITTLE JERK