Your Creative Drive

[Shit Dickface]

QUESTIONS!

I'm gradually getting back to writing on the reg, and while it feels good there are just some times where I don't want to do a thing. I know it's not one of those things you can force (even if you're Ari), and you sort of have to find your element, but it's still a pain in the ass to feel idle.

I even get great ideas, forget to write them down, and wind up screwing around instead of at least documenting them. I cranked out three pages last night, which was great, but I ended up hitting a wall.

What do y'all creative types do to get the spark going?

[Abraham Smashington]

Honestly? I need to be miserable to do it. It fucking sucks.

[V]

Drinking's good.

Sex is better.

Picking a fight is best of all!

[Shit Dickface]

but if I'm drinking, fucking, and fighting I don't have any free hands to write

[Abraham Smashington]

I can't paint if I'm happy. I can't write if I'm happy. I can't do most shit if I'm happy. Everything just feels forced. And it doesn't help that I was a miserable person for 15+ years. As soon as I get happy (see Lesley coming into the picture) my creative output = null (minus the podcasts and shit)

[Abraham Smashington]

But what has helped me in the past is listening to music, smoking (although according to everyone I know I'm a weird stoner as I tend to get crazy motivated) or even meditating.

[BillyG]

Honestly? I need to be miserable to do it. It fucking sucks.

This is me, exactly. I don't write nearly like I used to because I stay incredibly miserable and I don't want to be a drunk writer. I bought a new moleskin, and I've written here and there as the moment strikes. I used to write a lot until I was about 23, and I never forced creative writing. I could crank out a report or a discussion on a subject without trying, but creative writings I let come on their own. If I have to sit down at a computer, it won't work. That's why I always kept a small pad and pen on me. I could write hard for a few days, then not touch it again for a month.

[Lisa]

I've had a creative block with my painting and art in general for over seven years now. For more than seven years, I think I've done about seven pieces of artwork. I used to do about three paintings a week. Then when my brother was diagnosed with cancer - I can't describe it. It's not like I lost the interest, or didn't want to paint anymore - I want to paint every day. I think the best way to describe it is that it's like I could never paint at all in the first place. I tried everything - sitting around in front of the canvas, just splashing paint on it to see what came out of my brain - nothing. It would just turn into a mess. And before that, a lot of my best work came out of just fucking around in front of the canvas, or out of mistakes - having a painting go completely wrong, and then just playing with it. And now I can't even do that. I've had full tubes of paint just dry up from me not doing anything.

My mother tries to help - she always says, "Do it in honor of your brother!" And I said, "Mom, I don't know how much plainer I can put this. I haven't stopped painting because I'm depressed that we lost Bri. And it's not that I don't want to paint - I look at my art supplies every day and want to do it. But it's like I was never able to paint to begin with - it's a total creative block." It's like - I've never been able to play music, okay? So if you handed me a guitar, I wouldn't know what to do with it. THAT'S what it's like when I'm in front of a canvas anymore. It's like the paintings I've already created were done by someone else. It's a total complete creative block, and I don't know how to undo it. And the handful of paintings I've done since late 2002 just look like shit - they're nothing I'm proud of. So, I don't know how to fix it. I'd love to, but I just don't know how to break through it.

Actually, one of the things that George and I have in common is that he's a wonderful artist - his stuff is really good. And when I showed him my artwork, which is all around in the 9"x12" or 11"x14" size, he said, "You have to bust out onto bigger canvases. That's what I think." My stuff is all abstract, and he said, "This is great stuff, but it belongs in a big size. You're going to feel freer that way, and moving around a bigger canvas is going to make you feel less restricted." I haven't tried it yet, because I just don't have room in my apartment. But he's probably right - it sounds like a great idea.

[Shit Dickface]

Yeah, I'm not gonna bitch too much compared to what most artists go through - at least with writing you can sorta fake it 'till you make it and there's always some sort of inspiration/interaction you can use. Painting/sculpting is so immediate and visual that I can't really imagine how most people just throw themselves into it and make it happen.

[B_Metal]

Being pissed at the world usually works for me. If you can't get there, go shooping & ask the idiots @ the store questions. Sheer ineptitude is infuriating.

[Captain Russ]

I usually look at other people who have come before me and done it better, and try to distill the whys and wherefores for their work's successes and try to take a few nuggets of suggestion from that.

Or I try to immerse myself in photos, art blogs, and music until something strikes.

And really, even if there is just a passing thought/concept/moment of idiocy that piques my interest, I've started in on making it a habit of writing it down (whether on my phone when moving around throughout the day, or a scrap of paper, or on the com-pew-tar).

No matter how much I doubt it as anything to build upon, there's a certain amount of creative linkage that begins to formulate in my shitferbrains brain.

Dunno if that at all helps, but it's great to hear you're getting the bug again.

[BillyG]

I can admit this as well. I wasn't trying to be a writer for the sake of the sanctity of the written word, or any kind of shit like that. I was always pretty talented in school with my writing assignments, and I had a great imagination. I wanted to write, and be a writer, because I wanted to do something I loved...and get muthafuckin PAID. I wanted to write a fulfilling book that was personal, but genre busting, got onto Oprah's bookclub, optioned for big money, and got me fucking rich. Once I realized that wasn't happening my writing slowed down considerably.

[Lisa]

I think the last really good painting I did - albeit a scary one - was one that I did about a month after we found out my brother was sick. It's just black over white abstract, with the pattern scraped into it with a pallet knife. I posted it over at an art forum I used to go to, and the handful of comments were "Scary", "disturbing" and "turmoil." Then I got a PM from one woman at the board who said, "I don't know what's going on in your life right now, but it's clearly something. I'm a licensed therapist, and I just wanted you to know that if you ever need to talk to me about anything, you can always PM me." I never did, but oddly enough, that's probably the one painting - more so than any of my happier stuff - that inspired that many comments.

[Matt]

Heavy metal gets me going. I'm serious. I don't know why it is, but heavy metal (the GOOD stuff, not just any old shit will do) just starts my creative juices flowing.

Still, I find that I lack the desire to sit in front of a computer and just write anymore...that's probably because I'm stuck in front of a computer for 8-9 hours every day.

[Shit Dickface]

Still, I find that I lack the desire to sit in front of a computer and just write anymore...that's probably because I'm stuck in front of a computer for 8-9 hours every day.

I have this problem too. I hate writing in a notebook after a while because my hand cramps and my handwriting is shit, so they both cancel each other out after a while.