Texas: WAY COOLER THAN MINNESOTA AND OHIO

[Captain Russ]

It's going to be huge, but I wouldn't be caught anywhere near that fucking zoo.

Hotels from Fort Worth to Dallas will be jammed like Dachau.

[BillyG]

Only 10? I AM DISAPPOINT. Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrything bigger in Tejas yeeeeeeeeehaw.

[Captain Russ]

We'll knock some of those assholes out of contention soon enough.

I'm just so proud we've finally cracked the top ten.

[BillyG]

Kind of shocked that Dallas has taken this long. You would figure the big hair blonds and fake Beverly Hills crowd would have been top 3 since the 80s.

[Captain Russ]

Our drivers should have put us in the top five alone.

But lump the Highland Park cuntery in with it, baby you gotta a socio-economic cesspool goin'.

[BillyG]

Oh and more good news from Texas! Rick "I wanna be your prez" Perry and his band of we-wont-raise-taxes-because-we-aint-pinkos-even-though-we-are-running-a-severe-deficit bunch are cutting hundreds of millions of dollars in Houston alone for important things like hospital, public school, and college aid funding. Cy-Fair ISD, the 3rd biggest district in Texas and biggest in Houston that all the precious lil snowflake parents move to, their president came out today and said that because of the Republicans ignorant refusal raise taxes just a tiiiiny part of a percentage point they are losing $80-100mil this year alone in things like...oh keeping the teachers employed.

[Captain Russ]

If we are talking strictly political assholery, Texas is leading the charge in many ways. So much neglect, arrogance and general pussified capitulation to the worst interests.

Jesus. Someone get Dave Simon down here.

[BillyG]

Politically we are the goddamn worst. And that's leaving the partisan bullshit out of it, and just look at what you said, the neglect and arrogance. Texas has been propped up by the energy companies, but nobody wants to remember the 80s and what happened when the bubble popped.

[Lisa]

How the fuck did we drop to #2?? HOW? Now I have to kill you all!

[B_Metal]

Oh and more good news from Texas! Rick "I wanna be your prez" Perry and his band of we-wont-raise-taxes-because-we-aint-pinkos-even-though-we-are-running-a-severe-deficit bunch are cutting hundreds of millions of dollars in Houston alone for important things like hospital, public school, and college aid funding. Cy-Fair ISD, the 3rd biggest district in Texas and biggest in Houston that all the precious lil snowflake parents move to, their president came out today and said that because of the Republicans ignorant refusal raise taxes just a tiiiiny part of a percentage point they are losing $80-100mil this year alone in things like...oh keeping the teachers employed.

If I had money to wager I'd bet the farm that somehow it's Obama's fault that Texas is in the shitter. I look for Perry to start hammering that shit soon.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

[BillyG]

So that huge deficit that the fuckers won't raise taxes to cover? Their grand plan includes making state employees pay for parking during the work week (sure to go over like a lead balloon considering what they are paid) and to OPEN LIQUOR STORES ON SUNDAY. Now of course this should happen, but this is what the "family oriented conservatives" want to do to raise money? HILARIOUS. Oh, and it will make up to $7.5mil in tax revenue....so where's the rest of the billion coming from?

[Captain Russ]

Fucking fucky fucks.

[B_Metal]

And we still have idiots driving around with secession themed bumper stickers. Lulz

[BillyG]

GOD YES I want to fucking kill them. I bet they're patriots for wanting to secede.

I saw a dude in a crew cab F350 today with longhorns on the front...very JR.

[B_Metal]

BUT we haz all teh oilz gaiz!!!

*begins arming just in case eejits get any bright ideas*