What Emmanuelle Movie Did You Just Watch?

[Anderson]

Halloween 2018 was the goods. Classical without being nostalgia-porn Malibu Stacey's new hat bullshit and genuinely effective from start-to-finish.

Kills was Green going "Fuck it!" and making the ultimate slasher movie we would have watched on USA Saturday Nightmares in the 80s/90s. A cake made entirely of frosting, and Goddamn I loved every bite.

Ends I have no desire to watch however. It's test screenings have been nothing short of disastrous and Blumhouse knows they're fucked.

Having seen one of those cuts, I was about to put the laundry in the streets. But, looks like Viewer Anon beat me to it.

[Captain Russ]

The Chicken Little character of Anthony Michael Hall is still probably my favorite part of Kills.

That and the logo theme on the score. That thing is so fucking mean sounding.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Halloween 2018 was the goods. Classical without being nostalgia-porn Malibu Stacey's new hat bullshit and genuinely effective from start-to-finish.

Kills was Green going "Fuck it!" and making the ultimate slasher movie we would have watched on USA Saturday Nightmares in the 80s/90s. A cake made entirely of frosting, and Goddamn I loved every bite.

Ends I have no desire to watch however. It's test screenings have been nothing short of disastrous and Blumhouse knows they're fucked.

[Abraham Smashington]

I'm the guy who fucking loves Halloween Kills.

Welcome to the club. Kills is the high point but I legit kind of love Ends. It's just so dumb.

[FilmNerdJamie]

I'm the guy who fucking loves Halloween Kills.

[Timothy225]

They should've stopped at the 2018 reboot. Hell, they should've stopped after 1981's Halloween II, and kept the anthology vibe going that Carpenter wanted with Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

[Captain Russ]

I think there is a skeleton of ideas buried beneath the mess that could have worked had they swapped Ends with Kills in their chronology of occurrence in the broad strokes and gave a lot more thought to their structures and overall thesis (in this case, handed to somebody else entirely to write--4 credited writers is always a good sign in horror especially). Something much more interesting is there, which is why it is so bizarre to see it all mishandled so deftly.

What is there is an absolutely hilarious corpus of bad management, toothless delivery, and another extension of the absolutely emptyheaded social commentary leveled by an insular, would-be creative cannibalistic community of overcompensated ghouls.

[BillyG]

Halloweens Ends is offensive. It's terrible, and they don't even have the decency to make it fun and terrible. It's fucking boring. Laurie somehow went from T2 Linda Hamilton to merry little homemaker even though Meyers is just OUT THERE. Every single person in the town is a fucking idiot and/or rotten to their goddamn core. Granddaughter was acting like a 13 year old from West Virginia being groomed by a 30 year old pedophile.

  Spoiler: spoilers 

The fucking FUNERAL procession. Oh my god. I was convinced Jamie Lee Curtis was lowering herself into the grinder or being pulled down by Mike at the last second. What an abomination. This is an edgy teenager writing fan fiction where he gets to meet his hero Michael Meyers and given the mask after a night of killing together to prove his worth. ALSO WHY DID MIKE MEYERS DRAG HIM INTO THE SEWER THEN WAS LOCKED BEHIND THAT WALL 30 SECONDS LATER OR WHATEVR THE FUCK

Absolutely terrible movie.

[Abraham Smashington]

You know, I almost want to believe this is a response to all of the nerds who hated that Mikey was an murderin' machine in the second one. They scrapped the original script for some reason, as all of these were supposed to take place on the same night, so who knows?

Although with how fucking weird the entire town was and the dialogue and choices the characters made I honestly thought the whole thing was going to be a dream sequence or some shit. It was all sooooo over the top.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Oh! You mean

  Spoiler: spoilers 

Corey Kills with Special Guest Star Michael Myers

[Abraham Smashington]

It's dumb but there is a point where I was fully on board with the nonsense.

HALLOWEEN ENDS. LOL. LOL FUCKING LOL.

[BillyG]

Just downloaded Orphan First Kill based on your uhhh glowing? recommendation.

[Abraham Smashington]

Significant Other - New flick on Paramount +. Didn't watch a trailer, saw that the chick from It Follows/The Guest and PLOP from The Office were in it. Seemed like a horror movie so we watched it last night. I was interested during the first shot. Then the movie kicks in and it feels like it's a movie you've seen a million times but then it decides to go in a different direction during a scene at a firepit (you'll know the one) where the movie decides to kick you in the nuts on your expectations of the movie that i ended up really fucking digging. 85 mins, nothing spectacular but I had a ton of fun with it.

[Abraham Smashington]

Orphan:First Kill - Yeah, I wasn't expecting much and got so much more than I ever expected. I had assumed they were gonna just rehash the first movie without having the revelation that comes in the end of that movie. Yeah, no. It starts off shaky as fuck but as soon as

  Spoiler: massive spoilers 

Esther kills that detective ane then Julia Stiles shows up and fucking finishes the job

AND THEN

  Spoiler: massive spoilers 

it comes to light that her asshole kid actually killed the kid that Esther was impersonating

I was fully in.

It was fun and low budget and their attempts to Gandalf/Frodo this bitch was hilarious. AND THERE IS A DOUBLE, AND THERE IS BAD FORCED PERSPECTIVE, AND THERE IS THE MAIN ACCTRESS ON HER KNEES...lololol. Still nuts that this came out because who the fuck was clamoring for a prequel to the ridiculous movie Orphan? Also, how was this better than that new Hellraiser? The more I sat on that, the more I realize I am not a fan past the cool box design and the nerve ending shit.

[Abraham Smashington]

Yeah, this was Lesley's second pick in a row to be MEH.