Pure and Utter Randomness!

[Ari]

So yesterday, I was talking to Nerdious on the phone. Basically, I was calling him a hibernating panda for blocking anyone from seeing when he is on X-box Live and hiding his Facebook wall (which he said was an accident).

I told Mr Dorkus that if he wanted to hibernate, then fine, I wouldn't bother him till spring. Since he lives alone I began to joke about his insane private life and how he must always be out partying or watching Avatar over and over (you see people, he never leaves his apartment and he hated Avatar, so I'm being facetious) when, according to him and his 5 minute non-stop girl giggling, I hit gold I guess.

I called him Nav'ius Dorkus.

I swear, I haven't heard a grown man laugh so hard and for so long since I watched the Dayman episode of Sunny.

I can still hear his azn girl giggles.

[nerdious dorkus]

And that, sir, is why you are my constant.

[Abraham Smashington]

I need to change his user name to that haha.

And yeah, stop going all ninja motherfucker. I don't want to have to txt you about FIFA.

[nerdious dorkus]

No. And I haven't really been wanting to play anything lately. TV and food are consuming me while I'm consuming it.

[Ed Hocken]

I'm the Jeremy Renner of bill payers.

[B_Metal]

This guy at the park just tried to dunk the ball and he missed and landed awkward on his ankle. I think he broke it. My four year old laughed his ass off. I hugged him and said "that's my boy." I'm so proud right now.

[Shit Dickface]

This guy at the park just tried to dunk the ball and he missed and landed awkward on his ankle. I think he broke it. My four year old laughed his ass off. I hugged him and said "that's my boy." I'm so proud right now.

looool

[gravedigger]

In the past two days I've seen three dudes who look almost exactly like Vault Vanderhuge. So, does Vault Vanderhuge look like everybody or does everybody look like Vault Vanderhuge? I'm pretty sure I'm not in the Matrix because the doppelgangers aren't wearing red dresses.

[Ari]

In case anyone had questions about how the Carchunga Index (created by Carl “Carchunga” Malone back in 1928) works, please see below for clarification:

Going to a Ke$ha concert would rate a 12.5 on the Carchunga Index.
Going to a Justin Bieber concert would rate a 1,228.2 on the Carchunga Index.
Tearing open the seam in your pants while at work rates a 98.3 on the Carchunga Index.
Slamming your finger in a car door while on a first date would rate a 783 on the Carchunga Index.
Getting into a near fatal car crash that leaves you paralyzed for life would rate a 2 on the Carchunga Index.
Winning a Lottery pool of over $50 million would rate a 1.5 on the Carchunga Index.

It is scientifically impossible to rate a 1 on the Carchunga Index by any known means at this point in time, but a .5 rating is quite common.

Thank you. Hopefully this will quash any other questions that you may have had.