Get to Know Me

[Ari]

This is from an e-mail I filled out that my buddy was sending around work. I figured most people here really don't know me all that well, so maybe this will help, "break the ice". If you're bored, erase my crap and write in your own! It's real fun, but please be serious.

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. My first job was when I was 2. I was tasked with monitoring governmental activities deep within third world countries and regulating the uprising of radical insurgents in said locations. I got fired when I pooped my diapers during a rebel raid.
2. My second job was paperboy. I could never make it to the end of the week, due to all the damn grim reapers and crazy dogs. The end obstacle courses were cool.
3. When I turned 15 I started doing tricks for crack. I still miss that job?
4. I currently film tortoise porn, and am looking to get into sea turtles and walruses.

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Van Helsing. Cause I love retarded bullshit nonsense stupid crap.
2. Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector. Cause the title confuses me till my pee burns.
3. Spice World. No explanation needed.
4. Bukaki Blasters Part 6. Definitely the best of the series.

C) Four places I have lived:
1. In March of 1979 I had a cozy home with a few million other siblings located to the right of my dad?s dong.
2. After that I moved into a womb. It sucked being all alone, but at least I had plenty of time to watch CHiPs.
3. Buckingham Palace. I was the queen?s booty call.
4. I currently live in Optimus Prime?s trailer hitch with all the dino bots.

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. Dancing with the Stars. I really love watching a bunch a fuck-dillies prance around for an hour before I go run off to masturbate with sandpaper.
2. The Hills. These people are so very interesting and fascinating to watch that only a complete idiot wouldn?t tune in.
3. Entertainment Tonight. I just love when they spend 15 minutes on some lovely actresses wedding dress. And the mannequins on the show almost seem lifelike nowadays!
4. Anything on Lifetime. Cause my vagina?s not drippy enough yet.

E) Four places I have been:
1. The Death Star II. Kinda chilly, but no so bad.
2. Snake Mountain. I?ll never understand why there were no snakes, but tons of rats.
3. Thunderia. I?m allergic to cats so I couldn?t stay long.
4. I once walked by Rosie O?Donnell. She?s the size of a country, so I do believe that counts.

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. NAMBLA. I?ll pay you bastards the damn membership fee, just get off my ass already!
2. Circle Jerker?s Weekly. I like to know what the cracker of the month is.
3. Matzo Insider. Up to date e-mails on the world of matzo. Can?t live without it!
4. You?reSpecial.com. Cause I am, damnit! I know I am! When my mom took me to my prom, and then stayed as my date, she kept saying I was a real special boy, and e-mails from this site help confirm what my mom has always known.

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Alabama Black Snake. Especially with spicy mustard. Yum!
2. KY Jelly.
3. 2nd round corn.
4. Spam.

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. In bed with Steve Buscemi
2. In the shower with my uncle, just like when I was a kid!
3. In a midget gang bang.
4. Inside the pants of one of those hot Wal-Mart greeters.

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. I
2. Have
3. No
4. Friends

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Testicular Cancer
2. Infant deaths. Nothing makes me happier than the look on the face of a tiny, dead baby!
3. Sodomy by a tractor.
4. Larry the Cable Guy: Witless Protection.

[Abraham Smashington]

Re: Get to Know Me

I'll try to do a serious take on this, as I probably can't top Ari's at the moment...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Maintenance worker at Cub Foods for 3 months
2. Distance Education Coordinator for a business college.
3. Network Technician for the same business college.
4. I currently work as a Blackboard Specialist (it's not nearly as cool as it sounds) for the same business college.

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Hackers for the fucking win...
2. Dawn of the Dead (original and remake)
3. Star Wars (original trilogy only)
4. Bukaki Blasters Part 6. Definitely the best of the series. (I disagree with this one, everyone know that after part 2, they began treading water)

C) Four places I have lived:
1. Germany
2. Boston
3. Minnesota
4. my own head

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. BSG for the fucking win
2. Lost
3. Supernatural
4. The Wire

E) Four places I have been:
1. Seattle (the best place ever)
2. Boston
3. Calgary
4. Mt. Rushmore

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. Idiotic instructors
2. Annoying fucking students
3. My mommy
4. Lesley

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Steamers
2. A bigass rack of ribs
3. Beer Brats
4. Hummus

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. Seattle
2. Seattle
3. In a midget gang bang.
4. Seattle

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1.Who
2. Fucking
3. Cares
4. ?

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Staying smoke free (for reals this time)
2. Drinking more
3. Working out more
4. Possibly going to PAX

[Ari]

Re: Get to Know Me

Midget Gang Bang for the win!

[nerdious dorkus]

Re: Get to Know Me

4. Possibly going to PAX

haha. i went to pax last year. i actually live right around the corner from the washington convention center so my neighborhood was overrun by nerds that weekend. i went just to watch the wizard with other nerds. hahaha. it was just as bad when sukura-con was going on. probably worse, since there were cosplay kids. all dressed as.... yes, you guessed it, naruto. believe it!

[Sarah]

Re: Get to Know Me

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Ross "Dress for Less" ...yeah I kind of got fired at that job
2. Target...I was a Security Guard, Yaay!
3. Credit Union...I was a bank teller!
4. Credit Union..after 10 years in the industry I'm now a Branch Supervisor...

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Wizard of Oz...my mother hates this movie because of me.
2. Young Guns....I can and will recite this movie.
3. Harry Potter...don't ask me to pick
4. Lord of the Rings....the entire Saga...I watched LOTR Fellowship 11 times in theaters

C) Four places I have lived:
1. Reno, NV
2. Basalt, CO
3. Somis, CA
4. Simi Valley, CA...for the last 25 years of my life...

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. It's Always Sunny in Philly!!
2. The Office
3. Lost
4. American Idol

E) Four places I have been:
1. Disneyland
2. Mexico
3. Portland, OR
4. Salt Lake City, UT

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. Ari
2. My Mama
3. My boss
4. My employees

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Mac n' cheese & hot dogs
2. Pizza
3. Grilled cheese sandwiches with ketchup
4. Orange chicken form Panda Express

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. In the bedroom (wink, wink)
2. Disneyland
3. Home with my 360
4. Home with my 4 chihuahuas

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. Lesley
2. ?
3. What friends??
4. Big Brother???

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Comic Con Baby!!!
2. Harry Potter (November)
3. Iron Man
4. Losing my extra 50 lbs.

[Ari]

Re: Get to Know Me

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Comic Con Baby!!!
2. Harry Potter (November)
3. Iron Man
4. Losing my extra 50 lbs.
5. Making Ari dinner

You almost forgot one!

[nerdious dorkus]

Re: Get to Know Me

i guess i'll do this...

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...

A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. in n out - gosh i hated that job. the manager didn't like me as well so i always had to do clean-up. only upside to that job was the "hooks ups" i got
on frys and food, depending on who was working; and the in n out picnic, all you can eat in n out burgers. oh man that was fantastic.
2. target - first as a cashier, then in electronics telling stupid parents that n64 games didn't work with playstation games. ugh. and then in the cash
office.
3. countrywide - i was a "loan counselor" aka collector. you know those calls your parents would get and would start yelling and screaming? yah...
4. credit union - branch teller. it's how i got to know sarah and ari.

B) Four six movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. brazil
2. fight club
3. back to the future trilogy
4. i heart huckabees
5. clerks
6. home alone

C) Four places I have lived:
1. van nuys, ca
2. simi valley, ca
3. seattle, wa
4. my room

D) Four six TV Shows that I watch:
1. heroes
2. house, m.d.
3. csi
4. bizzare foods with andrew zimmern
5. mythbusters
6. lost

E) Four places I have been:
1. i
2. don't
3. get
4. out much.

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. ari
2. sarah
3.
4.

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. sushi
2. pizza
3. banh mi (vietnamese sandwiches)
4. pho (vietnamese noodle soup)

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. in my apartment, sleeping or playing some video games or cheezing... i mean "dealing with my kittens"
2. simi valley, ca
3. at ari and sarah's house, scaring their dogs
4.

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. ari
2. sarah
3. what
4. friends?

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. pax
2. emerald city comic con
3. iron man
4. i was going to put sukura con here but it's today and i have no monies... i wanted to go again this year to see all the cosplay nerds. and the hot
cosplay girls. mmmmm

[Ari]

Re: Get to Know Me

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. in my apartment, sleeping or playing some video games or cheezing... i mean "dealing with my kittens"
2. simi valley, ca
3. at ari and sarah's house, scaring their dogs
4.

Funny how 2 out of 3 of those are in Simi. Sure you don't want to come back? I still haven't played Risk: Godstorm yet!

[nerdious dorkus]

Re: Get to Know Me

Funny how 2 out of 3 of those are in Simi. Sure you don't want to come back? I still haven't played Risk: Godstorm yet!

yah well i consider your place a whole different world when compared to all of simi.

[Lesley]

Re: Get to Know Me

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Provision Security.... I hate key fobs.... don't get me started.... don't even get me started!
2. Juut SalonSpa - I made a lot of great friends while working there, wasn't a fan of most of the customers
3. It took me 2 months serving at some restaurant (I can't even remember the name of the place) to realize that I HATE serving
4. For a little over a year I helped someone clean an office building on Sundays.... it paid pretty well, except it ruined my weekends.

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Dazed and Confused, alright, alright, alright
2. The Labyrinth - I watched it a million times when I was a kid, and I still love it
3. There are several chick flicks that come to mind (I'm girly like that) - e.i. The Notebook, Failure to Launch, etc.
4. At Christmas time I always feel the need to watch Elf or Love Actually or The Family Stone

I know that was more than 4 but I couldn't decide - I even stood looking at our movie collection for a while.

C) Four places I have lived:
1. Mahtomedi, MN
2. Bellingham, WA
3. Minneapolis, MN
4. Bloomington, MN

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. The Office - which I can't wait to watch again
2. Lost
3. BSG
4. Dexter

E) Four places I have been:
1. Vancouver/Victoria, BC, Canada
2. Mexico
3. Seattle, WA
4. Tucson, AZ

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. My co-workers
2. Rob's mom
3. My step-dad
4. Visa/Discover/American Express reminding me of new bills (I hate them)

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Shrimp
2. Crab
3. Lobster
4. Steamers (yeah, I like seafood)

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. anywhere as long as it was the weekend
2. Seattle, WA
3. Tucson, AZ
4. Vancouver, BC

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. Um...
2. Who
3. hasn't
4. yet?

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Going to Seattle
2. summer
3. Renaissance Festival
4. getting a second cat

[patronsaintofcheeseburgers]

Re: Get to Know Me

I think I sent this to Ari via e-mail originally...so I'll try to duplicate this the best I can...

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Dog Walker: for a cool Jewish lady from the Bronx. I got paid like 5 bucks a week and an assload of cookies. She made some delicious cookies...by far the best job I have ever had.
2. Roll N Rye: Jewish deli, I prepped food and washed dishes. Worked for a crazy/rich Jewish lady named Rita Zide. She is cool people but intense about everything, also she's a hardcore carpet eater...Employees had to pay for all food and the shit was mad expensive. My checks would be like 100 bucks but I would take home like 50 after the meal deductions.
3. Pavilions Market: worked for another Jewish broad named Rhonda. She was a total cunt. Fucking customer service manager bitch was always walking around with a fucking Kool-Aid smile reminding us about customer service....you know how I feel about the customer...they can eat a dick!
4. Security at a world renowned location...I need to get the hell out of my current job. It sucks plantains...

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Heat, one of the greatest Los Angeles movies ever. Fucking DeNiro and Pacino are gods in this flick.
2. Planet Terror, I just saw this about a month ago and wow...I need to buy this ASAP
3. Dawn of the Dead(s), the og and the remake. I love this shit
4. Anything by Scorsese, Tarantino or Robert Rodriguez, I own most of their movies and I can watch all of them over and over and over and over...


C) Four places I have lived:
1. Culver City, Ca...my hometown, I grew up in the same city that housed MGM and now the current Sony Studios. The house I grew up in was made in the 30's for actors that worked on movies like the Wizard of Oz and shit...
2. Hawthorne, Ca...complete shit hole. Happy I moved out of this place...but the food was good here.
3. Los Angeles, Ca...I will try to never leave this city I love it here
4. ...I've run out of spots....My mother's womb for the first 9 months of my life?

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. Baseball Tonight
2. Curb Your Enthusiasm
3. South Park
4. Ninja Warrior?

E) Four places I have been:
1. Tijuana/Rosarito, BC Mexico
2. Las Vegas (a meeelion times probably)
3. Eureka, Ca
4. I really don't get out much. :'(

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. People at my job
2. People selling viagra
3. Papa John's
4. Your Mom

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Cheeseburgers...I am fucking Wimpy I can/will eat burgers all day everyday
2. Pizza...has to be good, NY style is preferred
3. Lobster...yeah lobster's great
4. Steak, I eat this shit like a few nights a week. God bless red meat.

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. Mexico, chilling on the beach
2. Home leveling up on COD4
3. New York, Yankee Stadium
4. With your mom...

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. I
2. have
3. no
4. friends...that's why I chat on forums all day. :-[

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Going to New York to see the Yankees
2. Going to see your mom
3. Getting a blu-ray player
4. Getting out of debt...

[Corey]

Re: Get to Know Me

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Taco Bell I was 16, and boy did i give alot of free shit away ( you know who you are)
2. Country Wide (nothing good to say about that craphole NOTHING)
3. A Chocolat Factory ( honestly i can't remeber the damn name of the place) and no it wasn't like fuckin willy wonka well sort of, we just did'nt have the money for a choclote water fall.
4. Home Theater Installer, i do mostly sales now but still install on the side

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. Star wars but only cuz ari makes me but don't telll him that i wouldn't want him to cry again becasuse i hrt his feelings
2. Lord of the rings but only cuz sarah makes me but don't tell her that i wouldn't want her to kill me
3. ok im putting 2 in here (1) spaceballs (2) blazing sddles im sorry they are good classics
4. damn this is kinda hard im always with ari and sarah so ya what ever they said...

C) Four places I have lived:
1. Northridge for about a year
2. Simi Valley
3. Palmdale
4. Simi Valley--- yes yes i know i already put this but its better than leaving it empty

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. CSI vegas
2. Family Guy
3. Pratically anything on G4 and spike
4. Anything ari makes me watch

E) Four places I have been:
1. Hawaii--- best fucking place ever especially from 14,000ft when you are thrown out of a plane reaching 120mph, than your shoot open and you see all of hawaii for 10mins
2. Lake Havasu
3. Laughlin
4. San Diego--- Ya i know my list isn't glamorous but i don't get out much

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. My aunt
2. Im with ari on Circle Jerker?s Weekly. its been a while though since me and ari have our own weeekly meeting
3. Clients i have to deal with from work
4. Myself just so i know im special

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Sushi
2. Mahi Mahi from Rubio's Baja Grill
3. Chicken moslty any kind
4. Anything frank makes (sarah's step dad)

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. Hawaii
2. In the shower with a hot female ( hmmm i wonder if ari is busy)
3. Playboy mansion
4. in ARI's pants im not sure why iether

I) Four friends I think will respond:
1. Sarah
2. I would say wayne but he has a girlfeind now and we never see him ( shit did i just say that outloud)
3. not ari he started this nonsence
4. ummm well hmmmm shit i don't know

J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. Comic Con for sure
2. a crap load of badaass movies
3. A few good VIdeo Games
4. nothing else comes to mind right now

[Nathan]

Re: Get to Know Me

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order...
A) Four jobs I have had in my life:
1. Bag boy/cashier at Fulmer, a local grocery
2. Pizza delivery guy/cook/shift manager
3. More pizza
4. I am the lead tech at a sleep lab (RPSGT)

B) Four movies I would watch over and over (or have watched over and over):
1. 2010
2. Star Trek 2
3. Predator
4. Alien

C) Four places I have lived:
1. In June of 1977 I had a cozy home with a few million other siblings located to the right of my dad?s dong. (too good not to reuse)
2. Dayton, OH
3. Dayton, OH
4. Dayton, OH

D) Four TV Shows that I watch:
1. BSG.
2. Deadliest Catch
3. Dirty Jobs
4. Good Eats/Iron Chef

E) Four places I have been:
1. Green River, WY. Van broke down there while on tour with a band. Awesome sky at night.
2. LA twice. Boring.
3. Florida. Hot, and boring.
4. DC twice. Hot, not as boring.

F) People who e-mail me (regularly):
1. My buddy mike.
2. My mom.
3. My coworker Martin.
4. That's about it.

G) Four of my favorite foods:
1. Campbells Bean w/Bacon soup. Loved it since I was a kid.!
2. Steak.
3. Spaghetti.
4. Pickles. Lots of 'em.

H) Four places I would rather be right now...
1. Home.
2. At my buddy Adam's house, poolside.
3. Hot tub.
4. Playboy mansion grotto. Cause' why not.

I) Four friends I think will respond:


J) Four Things I am looking forward to in 2008:
1. The Dark Knight
2. The rest of season 4 of BSG!
3. A raise.
4. Spaced on DVD.

[nerdious dorkus]

Re: Get to Know Me

4. Playboy mansion grotto. Cause' why not.

my brother got to go to the playboy mansion. the most exciting news he had for me was that there was a monkey running around. one of my friends, who's a porn producer, has been to the playboy mansion a few times and he had more to talk about than just monkies. hahahha.

[Nathan]

Re: Get to Know Me

If he's a porn producer the mansion must have seemed a little tame. Or maybe not?