New movies undeserving of their own thread 2: The Night It Came Home

[Captain Russ]

Well, he made Always. Not all of them are home runs.

And that lame-ass "Kick the Can" rendition in the Twilight Zone movie.



Cohen directed the Hard Rain retread?

Can't wait!

[Matt]

Even ALWAYS/THE TERMINAL/1941/HOOK are watchable. Even CRYSTAL SKULL, while not great, is watchable. He doesn't have any films that are complete bombs in terms of watchability.

[Anderson]

And that lame-ass "Kick the Can" rendition in the Twilight Zone movie.



Cohen directed the Hard Rain retread?

Can't wait!

Hard Rain is like a half-hour sitcom compared to The Hurricane Heist. Did you think Cohen missed the fucking point in Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story?

Well in Hurricane Heist, Cohen runs over the point while texting and then throws it into reverse because he had a seizure while selecting Emojis. Then, he hit it one more time because Jesus is Love and love exists in every print of The Hurricane Heist.

[Captain Russ]

I...I may have to see this for myself.

[BillyG]

Sarah and I are VERY excited for Hurricane Heist. I've laughed out loud every time I see the trailer.

[Anderson]

It's so fucking stupid that Ready Player One could be someone VR jerking off Donkey Kong while the Iron Giant claps to the rhythm and it wouldn't be anywhere near the stupid level of Hurricane Heist.

But, it's charming as fuck.

[FilmNerdJamie]

And that lame-ass "Kick the Can" rendition in the Twilight Zone movie.

It's all the worst tendencies of Spielberg. Then again, one has to remember he was legally forced into finishing Twilight Zone and after the Landis incident, he canceled his original segment - a retelling of The Monsters Are Due on Maple Street.

[FilmNerdJamie]

These A Wrinkle in Time reviews are for the ages in their chicken-shitness.

[Abraham Smashington]

I liked that Jordan Vogt-Roberts called that shit out.

[Captain Russ]

"At least you tried, champ!"

[Matt]

Digging the reviews that I'm seeing for READY PLAYER ONE

Also, TOMB RAIDER opened in Asia last weekend and I guess the word is decent on it.

[Anderson]

I love how I had 3 months of Film Twitter shitheels telling me to my face that RPO was going to bomb and Wrinkle was going to kill.

Never fucking doubt me.

[Abraham Smashington]

That's just stupidity. Not the doubting part, but come the fuck on...A Wrinkle in Time was never going to hit.

[Anderson]

I do have to gloat a little.

The amount of insane spin on Wrinkle is FOX News worthy level. Yeah, we've got two films directed by African Americans at the top of the box office. Top notch and a proud moment.

But, the deep dive to back pedal months of hype is wretched.

That's the kind of shit that puts people off certain films. If it sucked, it sucked. If it's good, it's good. If there's an in-between, acknowledge it.

The amount of spin to save face in the ever-crushing presence of reality is what will kill off this sub-section of internet dwellers.

[Abraham Smashington]

At least it wasn't in my face like the lady Ghostbusters debacle.