Prometheus and ALL OTHER NEW ALIEN/PREDATOR SPOILERS

[Abraham Smashington]

This is why I give fuck all about reviews

[Bobby Bear]

I'll be really interested to hear how it plays - genuinely.

Word here is divided, but I'd say the majority of reviews have been more positive than negative.

Same here. The Empire reaction doesn't surprise me in the least. I can't see them rocking the boat too much; they don't want to jeopardize any future Skype chats with Peter Jackson or Joss Whedon, et al. That probably sounds like a cheap, nasty shot, but they're like this a lot with the big genre stuff... that's their bread and butter.

Lest we forget:

• Exhibit "A" -- Cloverfield, 5 stars.
• Exhibit "B" -- The Phantom Menace, 4 stars.

I think they gave Superman Returns 5 as well.

[Matt]

I'm expecting a pretty movie at this point. That's it.

[Ben Thomas]

I'll be really interested to hear how it plays - genuinely.

Word here is divided, but I'd say the majority of reviews have been more positive than negative.

[Abraham Smashington]

I'm going in with the expectation that this will cure Feline AIDS along with halitosis.

[Timothy225]

Best friend and I are going to see it Friday as part of a double feature. Going in with no expectations at all.

[Bobby Bear]

Listen to Matt, guys. He knows the score.

[Matt]

Got tickets to see it sunday on the zoo Imax. Expectations are in check.

[Abraham Smashington]

Same. I'll never be let down as much as the NOES remake so BRING ON THE ISSUES YOU CRAZY PEOPLE HAVE.

[Captain Russ]

Can't wait to see it.

Hey what's going on in this thread?

[Bobby Bear]

I love you, Bob.

One thing I want to clear up - I'm not down on the film because it wasn't what I expected or wanted, as some of the film's defenders have suggested....

I was down on the film because the script just isn't good enough.

I want to play it all Solo and drop an "I know..." right now. But you deserve better than that. I love you too, man.

That's another brilliant point. I didn't go into the film with a list of what I wanted to see from it. The way I feel about it is: as long as you bring something worthwhile to the table -- in this case, the Alien saga -- more power to you. How you get there is your own prerogative.

There's no way this film, based on its own merits, warrants inclusion alongside the likes of Alien. It's a bad movie, and it would still be bad if it weren't called Prometheus, had no connection to Alien, and didn't come with all the build-up it did.

[Ben Thomas]

I love you, Bob.

One thing I want to clear up - I'm not down on the film because it wasn't what I expected or wanted, as some of the film's defenders have suggested. I always envy those that get something from a film that I didn't and tend to look for positives, provided what I'm watching isn't cynical. And I still recommend seeing it on the big screen if you're ever planning on watching it.

I was down on the film because the script just isn't good enough.

[Bobby Bear]

Ben, my friend, you are tearing it up in this thread. Haven't put a foot wrong with anything you've said.

*SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!*

With the exception of a few decent scenes, Prometheus plays like glorified fan-fic. It's been gussied up with all the craft you'd expect from Sir himself, but it's still a sorry excuse for a movie masquerading as Epic Sci-Fi. Arguably, a disappointment on par with the Prequel Trilogy, no doubt about it.

Terrible writing abounds and there's some really suspect effects/creature design work near the end. It's easily the most toothless entry in the series, a saga it really has no place in being as bland as this. My biggest problem with the film, aside from its dependance on tired horror beats -- delivered with a surprising lack of flair, mostly -- is how pointless it all feels. The Space Jockey wouldn't have become the Space Jockey, a symbol for That Which Is Best Left Unknown, if we'd seen, y'know... that which is best left off-screen. The film's very basis, then, totally betrays the Lovecraftian sensibilities that so enriched Dan O'Bannon's work. For a production that trumpeted how assured it was about this and that, I find it amazing how such a fundamental tenet of Alien-ness got overlooked.

It's not like I'm spitting blood about this. It's just a movie, after all. I'm more frustrated than anything because, like you said, Ben, this is a part of the Alien saga now. whether I like it or not (hint: I don't); and it's very existence is already taking away some of the magic of the original for me. It no longer exists as an unspoiled slice of utter fear and wonder, inviting an extraordinary amount of questions from such a simple, rich premise. It's the latest Crystal Skull, another Final Reunion Tour that should never have been. The black sheep who can't help but tarnish his siblings.

It's not good, you guys. Sorry.

You're gonna see it anyway and I will say, the 3D is the best I've seen since Cameron went into space last.

But in no way is this a 'good' film. I'll go into it more when more people have seen it. But I'd say Empire's review erred on the positive side for me...

Agreed about the 3D, although I think that says more about the poor standard of that generally, especially post-conversions, than it does about the quality of this film.

I still loved it, but I'm finding the people that are hating it to be far more fascinating.

I already feel myself backing off my presumptive Best of 2011 comment a few hours after seeing it. But, it's definitely in my Top 10 so far.

If you're expecting Alien, you're not getting Alien. If anything, I'm far more interested in what Ridley Scott did on camera than anything else. Can you accuse of him working from an undercooked script? Sure, but that's half of the man's career.

Still, I'd watch it over Aliens or Alien Resurrection.

What an indictment of this year so far that we can already be talking about this potentially being on a Best Of list. I understand what you're saying about what Scott was doing within the stiflingly poor limitations of the script, but that's still not enough to excuse its shortcomings. If this came from any other director, free of all the baggage, we'd be tearing this more holes than a Scottish Premier League defence. With good cause.

Ridley the stylist showed up. But there's no getting around that this IS in the Alien franchise and right now comes in under Alien 3 as a cohesive, dramatic narrative for me.

And how. I'd rather pretend this has nothing to do with the series, to be honest. It doesn't fit in tonally, no matter how many clunky attempts to bridge them there are.

Seriously, how redundant was the constant effort to elevate this into cinematic Sci-Fi haute cuisine? What was meant to be elegant and restrained -- like Alien -- felt disjointed and clumsy, from the cypher-characters to the structure on down. It was like watching someone fumble around using a language they can't quite grasp, trying to deliver poetry.

Script-wise, for sure. There's one semi-decent set piece I suppose, but the characters are jobs not people; the dialogue is bland and perfunctory; the design is all over the place; the story 'twists' are dumb; motivations are hazy to say the least and it lacks tension, suspense or thrills.

So yeah, I'll take Alien 3 over this. I doubt I'll ever watch Prometheus again.

The claustrophobic Noomi set-piece was probably the standout moment for me (or the Magneto map scene.) But it probably seemed better than it actually is surrounded by the rest of the movie. Everything about even that first booth moment, from the Geena Davis "I want it out of me!" line to the aftermath felt flat, tired, desperate to wow. It's so sad that a film with as much hype and anticipation around it, a film that promised something Sophisticated, gave us more running down corridors than anything else. Hardly the game-changer we were promised.

[Ben Thomas]

There was one poor shmo in our screening that clapped at the end and I heard another girl saying it was '9.75 out of 10', so clearly it works for some.

But there was one really angry fan girl saying to her fella, 'There were so many great concepts but... THEY JUST SHOULD HAVE LEFT ALIEN OUT OF IT!' I'm not surely I fully agree with her, but her reaction is much more in line with mine.

And it was definitely shot in 3D. Maybe it was just the IMAX picture quality, but it looked great to me, and I tend to avoid 3D where possible. Also, Fassbender is the best thing in it, though there is a nice sequence of Rapace running around in Leeloo-style bandages all sweaty. She's got some nice gams, that gal. Theron looked great too. But everyone else was wasted. I don't know why Idris Elba (making the most of a cliche-ridden part), Sean Harris or Rafe Spall even signed on - their characters are non-existent and were it not for the money and the chance to work with Sir Riddles, I doubt they would have done the film.

[B_Metal]

Netflix it is then. That's ok though, the wife loves shitty sci-fi so even if this is turrible she'll still love it.