Recast Your Favorite (or Least-Favorite) Movies!

[FilmNerdJamie]

I kept saying I was going to bring it up over here, and...it's about damn time I did so.

2000.

After a string of expensive non-starters, Warner Brothers plays a game of chance with the Superman franchise. They make the bold move of commissioning acclaimed screenwriter/director Frank Darabont (of The Shawshank Redemption and coming off the success of The Green Mile), a virgin to the sensibilities of blockbuster filmmaking, to revive the iconic superhero with Superman: The Man of Steel.

For influence, Darabont and writing-partner Chuck Russell (also serving as sole producer) rely heavily on the popular mid-80s John Byrne comic-run and go as far to seek consultation from Christopher Reeve and artist Alex Ross. So high on the project is the studio that they kill a "Young Clark Kent" pilot script set up at their sister network The WB and they agree to protect Darabont from interference from producer Jon Peters whose Wild Wild West disaster from 1999 cost them dearly. They also make the bold, and in some circles suicidal, strategic move to slot Superman to open the 2002 summer film season in the first weekend of May, despite fear of George Lucas' untitled second Star Wars prequel.

After a string of auditions and screen-tests, an unknown theater-teacher-turned-working class actor Jon Hamm is cast in the title role as Superman/Clark Kent and actress Elizabeth Banks secures the part of Lois Lane, after her turn in Wet Hot American Summer made her the favorite for director Darabont and producer Russell.

Following in the tradition of Richard Donner's Superman the Movie twenty years prior, the filmmakers pull a coup and pay top dollar for Anthony Hopkins to play Superman's doomed father Jor-El and Daniel Day-Lewis as his arch-nemesis, multi-billionaire Lex Luthor. Rounding out the cast is a slew of established name-actors including Kurt Russell and Sissy Spacek as Jonathan and Martha Kent, Bruce McGill as Daily Planet chief Perry White and Topher Grace as Jimmy Olsen.

In a climate following the events of 9/11, the world needs a hero and one who stands for truth, justice and the American way. When the teaser trailer appears in front of Harry Potter & the Sorcerer's Stone, audiences cheer and when Superman: The Man of Steel opens on May 3, 2002 it earns strong reviews and becomes the first film to break the $100 million barrier in its 3-day opening weekend and goes on to gross just over $400 million and paves the way for superheroes as a legitimate genre.

[Anderson]

Ok, I'll bite.


SUPERMAN: THE MAN OF STEEL


Superman/Kal-El/Clark Kent = Jon Hamm
Lex Luthor = Michael Emerson
Lois Lane = Jennifer Connolly
Perry White = John Mahoney
Jimmy Olsen = Donald Glover (changing that shit up, son)
Cat Grant = Anna Friel
General Sam Lane = Stacy Keach
John Corben/Metallo = John Krasinski
Ma Kent/Pa Kent = I like the current casting choices. I like them a lot. But, if we use Hamm...we can say they are dead or go older. If older, I'd go with Sissy Spacek and Tom Skerritt.

[FilmNerdJamie]

You talking circa 2011 in terms of time?

[Anderson]

You talking circa 2011 in terms of time?

Not so much. Just more of an OJ style "How I'd Do It"

[FilmNerdJamie]

Coming to Save the World - Summer 2012.

Edgar Wright's Ghostbusters
Written by Scott Alexander and Larry Karaszewski

Jason Bateman – Dr. Peter Venkman
Ed Helms – Dr. Raymond Stantz
Jennifer Garner - Dana Barrett
Stephen Colbert – Dr. Egon Spengler
Craig Robinson - Winston Zeddemore
Jack McBrayer - Louis Tully
Angela Kinsey - Janine Melnitz
Jeremy Piven - Walter Peck
Alan Arkin - Mayor Lenny

[Anderson]

Franklin J. Schaffner's

"THE MIGHTY THOR" (1969)

FX by: Ray Harryhausen


Charlton Heston = Thor
Roddy McDowall = Loki
John Huston = Odin
Katharine Ross = Nurse Jane Foster
Oliver Reed, Richard Harris and Peter O' Toole = The Warriors Three

Narrated by: Orson Welles

[FilmNerdJamie]

You. Are. Awesome!

[Anderson]

I did a bunch of anachronistic Marvel ones at CHUD. I have a few DC ones that I never used.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Yeah there was an epic one for Batman Begins and The Dark Knight circa 1987 and 1990 that was bloody fucking brilliant!

[FilmNerdJamie]

After announcing his intentions to retire from filmmaking, Oscar-winning director Steven Soderbergh decides one of his last films will delve into the horror genre. A sequel (or "loose continuation" as it's referred to as in some circles) to George A. Romero's 1968 horror classic Night of the Living Dead titled Dawn of the Dead.

Both Soderbergh and screenwriter/playwright Aaron Sorkin (fresh off his "Best Adapted Screenplay" Oscar for The Social Network) aim for something higher than a simple, fright-fest with its elaborate make-up effects done by Rick Baker and cheap scares. Following in the same vein as Night which intentionally or not (not according to Romero) reflected the civil rights movement of the 1960s, Dawn aims directly at consumer society as the four leads hide out in an abandoned, but fully stocked and equipped, shopping mall overrun by the undead or "shoppers" walking aimlessly.

Jude Law – Stephen

Idris Elba – Peter

Charlie Day – Roger

Emily Mortimer – Francine

[Abraham Smashington]

After announcing his intentions to retire from filmmaking, Oscar-winning director Steven Soderbergh decides one of his last films will delve into the horror genre. A sequel (or "loose continuation" as it's referred to as in some circles) to George A. Romero's 1968 horror classic Night of the Living Dead titled Dawn of the Dead.

Both Soderbergh and screenwriter/playwright Aaron Sorkin (fresh off his "Best Adapted Screenplay" Oscar for The Social Network) aim for something higher than a simple, fright-fest with its elaborate make-up effects done by Rick Baker and cheap scares. Following in the same vein as Night which intentionally or not (not according to Romero) reflected the civil rights movement of the 1960s, Dawn aims directly at consumer society as the four leads hide out in an abandoned, but fully stocked and equipped, shopping mall overrun by the undead or "shoppers" walking aimlessly.

Jude Law – Stephen

Idris Elba – Peter

Charlie Day – Roger

Emily Mortimer – Francine

[FilmNerdJamie]

Joe Dante's Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World (released in 1988) is a tough nut to crack...

[Captain Russ]

Ferris Bueller's Day Off.

In a world where Robert Evans was still hitched to Ali McGraw, he was riding high on the success of The Godfather, the Paul Verhoeven-directed Tron (that crazy Dutch bastard), the Paul Schrader-helmed, Tom Selleck-starring Indiana Jones franchise had put the studio on the lips and assholes of everyone in Hollywood. Evans was surfing the wave of the Gods with this amazing streak of successes, and he decided to get in on that 80's teen comedy craze that his fellow coke partier John Hughes was ranting and raving about several weeks prior, as they gacked up line after line on Evans' travelling robot wetbar (a gift from Sylvester Stallone and his manwife, Bridgette Nielsen).

Hughes threw him the script, Evans read it in between rails; the constant bleeps and bloops of J-Five became ever more distant as he immersed himself in the material and more cocaine. Hours seemed to pass, although it had only been minutes. Evans had just skimmed the first page over and over. He loved it. If the rest of the pages were nearly as good, he had full faith this would be a sure-fire hit. "Baby, you got yourself a go picture," he said. Hughes was ecstatic. They agreed the only person to handle such a fantastic piece of work was maestro John Landis, whose segment in Outer Limits: The Movie had earned him a standing ovation at Cannes that year. On conference call, Landis agreed to do the picture, but only if he could get Rick Baker for the creature effects. Evans and Hughes reassured him that there would be no need for practical application effects. Landis told them to go fuck themselves if they couldn't get Baker anyway. They got Baker by greasing the wheels on his dream project, Cadillacs and Dinosaurs. And with that, they got their director.

After the bender had ended several days later, with millions in property damage at Pepperdine University and Hughes forced to move to a non-extradition country, they were off to the races, baby.

Days later, Evans sat in his gold-encrusted office. Booger sugar was all over his face and desk. The orange of his skin and the white of nasal confection made him look like a deranged clown, or worse, a server at the Orange Julius. What kid could he get to play this force of anarchistic nature? This Ferris Fucking Bueller. Who had the charm, the wit, or the sociopathic undercurrent to get away with it?

Just then, he saw the sign. It opened up his eyes, he saw the sign.

On the television near his desk, Weird Science started. Evans had met Kelly LeBrock years ago, and as a sign of good faith (and the exchange of several bodily fluids) decided to watch her picture. He found his star in that misbegotten tale of hormones and homage to Wollstonecraft. That puffy-faced Puck, Robert Downey. He'd met Bob several times before. He was one of those up-and-comers that Hughes had a penchant for casting. He'd been Ducky in that pink movie with the kids Ali was smitten with, so how could he say no?

Evans had Downey over that afternoon, and they discussed the pathos of the character over steak and the devil's dandruff. Downey was game. He suggested his friend James Spader for the part of Cameron. Evans, projecting an aura of invincibility brought on by the red meat and stimulants, roared "BABY, YOU'VE GOT A GO-PICTURE!"

The cast was coming together like Evans and McGraw on ketamine.

Soon after, Hughes contacted Bob via carrier pidgeon with more suggestions for this dream project. The bird cooed and shat everywhere while Kid Notorious read the crayon-scribblings of the madman. Strangely, they were incredibly lucid scribblings. Each name that he could decipher he could not disagree with, nor would he. Evans made the calls from his golden-plated telephone.

The note read:

"Phoebe 'Magictits' Cates for Sloan. You know I'm right Evans. Don't shitfuck me on this. Unless your [sic] still wearing you're [sic] ass for a hat again, yull [sic] get Dr. Frankenfurter to play Principle [sic] Rooney. Grace, his secretary, should have hot legs. Get Madeline Kahn. Ferus' [sic] parents need tobee [sic] suburban yuppees [sic], so get Jason Robards and Jessica Lange. The larcenous parking attendant? Tayler [sic] Negron. He owes me a favour. Get Marty McFly's mom for Bueller's sister. I know shee [sic] is gonna do that stupid duck movie soon, but I think there's still thyme [sic] to buy out her contract. If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do it right. Love, John W. Hughes, Jr."

Upon its release, Ferris Bueller's Day Off received enormous praise, box office receipts on the level of Germany's GDP, Oscar nominations for Tim Curry and Madeleine Kahn and a win for Rick Baker for his bus-riding Gummy Bear Troll creation, and Hughes received a presidential pardon and a handy from Nancy at the Correspondents' Dinner.

And that, as they say, is history.

*RECAP*

Director: John Landis
Writer: John Hughes

Cast
Ferris Bueller: Robert Downey Jr.
Cameron: James Spader
Sloan Peterson: Phoebe Cates
Sister of Ferris: Lea Thompson
Grace: Madeleine Kahn
Rooney: Tim Curry
Ferris' Dad: Jason Robards
Ferris' Mom: Jessica Lange

[Abraham Smashington]

Joe Dante's Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World (released in 1988) is a tough nut to crack...

I want to read this one.

[FilmNerdJamie]

RE: Ferris Bueller.

Holy fuck. In a good way.