SPIDER-MAN, VENOM, NON MARVEL SPIDEY DOES WHAT A SPIDER CAN IF SONY LETS HIM

[Ed Hocken]

Listening to that man was worse than any moment he could come up with.

Don't even try to listen to the guy who does the comic reviews. He'll make you want to shoot your computer and yourself.

[Matt]

I dig that suit. But his head looks like a basketball.

Good GOD you're right.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Don't even try to listen to the guy who does the comic reviews. He'll make you want to shoot your computer and yourself.

They are so many people doing reviews over there. I tend to stick with only Nostalgia Critic & Chick and The Jewish Guy.

[Captain Russ]

Speaking like a tantrum-throwing child is no way to present an argument.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Where I really disagreed with Critic was his assessment that the dance number is what made people turn against the movie. Having sat through the midnight screening, I can say we knew something was off...like 5-10 minutes into Spider-Man 3.

Didn't matter by the time the dancing popped up. Everyone was openly MST3King the movie to abrupt laughter and not single "Shut the fuck up!" cry.

[V]

You and that critic should go bowling.

[Martin]

The dance number was just one of the so many problems of Spider-Man 3, but the main one? How about unfocused movie?

Fuck, can't see what Vin posted...

[Captain Russ]

I despise dancing.

All that flailing about and acrobatic nonsense.

[Matt]

actually, that whold dance number kinda MADE the film. Ah, I see...it's SUPPOSED to be a parody of a Spiderman film.

[Matt]

I despise dancing.

All that flailing about and acrobatic nonsense.

Nobody likes dancing. Nobody. Except of course for my wife. And her friends. And most of the people down at the pub. Actually, most people like dancing. Just not me, it's silly.

[V]

I despise dancing.

All that flailing about and acrobatic nonsense.

Now, stop that! Stop that this instant!

Right! Next sketch...

[Captain Russ]

Indeed.

Frightfully so.

It's tearing at the societal fabric.

Soon, there will be all sorts of terrible choreographed doggerel cluttering the streets.

Moving on...

[Martin]

You motherfuckers would make terrible Indians with all that dancing hatred.

[Captain Russ]

Let the Bureau of Indian Affairs handle it.

They have theater degrees, after all.

[Ari]

I want to see a real life take on Spider-Man, one directed by David Cronenberg.