What Emmanuelle Movie Did You Just Watch?

[FilmNerdJamie]

Bone Tomahawk

We wanted some kind of period piece horror movie. This isn't strictly horror, but Sarah's never seen it and loves westerns. Plus I am still teaching her the greatness of Kurt Russell. I forgot how slow that whole middle hour of that movie is. It's not boring, but it takes its time building up to confronting the troglodytes. Sarah almost vomited during the first sacrifice, which is saying something because she loves gore and scary shit. What a good fucking movie.

That dangling dick sells it.

[gravedigger]

I was going to finally give TRICK R TREAT a shot last night but it's not streaming anywhere so I watched RAW instead. It's pretty fucked up. The story is rather predicable but somehow that makes it more messed up for me. I feel the same way with the gore- if you make it realistic I have a much worse reaction than if it's over-the-top gross. It's a very good movie and everyone should watch it.

[BillyG]

Raw is incredible.

Trick r Treat isn't.

[BillyG]

Boys In The Trees

Saw someone say this was added to Netflix on Halloween, and that it is a great Halloween movie. Finally got around to it last night. I liked it, but it is not at all what I expected. It's about a group of boys in 1997 Adelaide going into their senior year of high school, and how they spend Halloween night. It opens very creepy, but it ends up being much more a coming of age story wrapped around a very moody and creepy setting.

So it's not really scary. And I got up to get a drink and missed a VERY IMPORTANT SCENE that make a lot of things not make sense until Sarah explained what I missed. But the director knows how to shoot, and there's some really awesome visual shots like the boys in costume at night skateboarding in the park with fireworks going off all over them, and the dressed up dark streets with Halloween decorations all over. It does a good job at building tension, but it's not a horror movie. I liked it though.

[Abraham Smashington]

The Belko Experiment.

Finally got around to watching this. McGinley and Gunn do some great work in this.

[BillyG]

The Belko Experiment.

Finally got around to watching this. McGinley and Gunn do some great work in this.

Had that sitting on Plex for like two months. Need to get around to it.

[Captain Russ]

Thor 3.


While I appreciate the embrace of the stranger things about Marvel, it all has a surface appeal to it here.

The constant shifts back to generic villain with familial ties doing generic villain things detracted from the genuine interest in Sakaar's intrigues. I think that may be the largest problem here, but there were small ones that really snowballed toward the end for me.

SPOILERS AHOY.

  Spoiler: Warning. I live in a salt mine. Marvel lives in my head rent free. 

There was an entire new world of weird to explore and they kept it brief all the way through. One whole fight in the arena, and that was it. One goddamn sequence of what made Planet Hulk so exciting --which is miles away more interesting than what we got-- and they drop that like a coed's fat ass at spring break. Only lip service is given to a slave uprising and it's all brushed aside, no comeuppance for MemeBlum or his ilk. Move along, idiot and get to the JOAKS.

Valkyrie was pretty good as far as an addition to Asgard's people are concerned and she felt like she belonged in the group (I'm sorry Sif), but the fact that any strife back in that realm is given solely to Idris to deal with and the Warriors Three are casually and almost mockingly murdered without any fanfare or stakes just tells me nobody is out to tell a story anymore, it's all vignettes and what you can sell people on to get them in the theatre. Cohesion is less important than trailer moments and a slew of poor-man's improv jokes.

The main example I came away with that just rustled my jimmies to the ends of the Earth was with Korg's quipping as the last remnants of Asgard (all generic extras borrowed from of Xena: Warrior Princess) watch the ultimate destruction of their home. It was a giant slap in the face. Who the hell thought that was a good idea? It's like everybody is terrified of having a negative feeling these days and everything needs to stay as carefree as possible, lest actions have repercussions with weight to them.

It's called fucking Ragnarok, the doom of a world and its people. This momentous event had about as much dramatic weight as missing a call from a telemarketer.

If the people running the show don't care, then why should the audience?

[FilmNerdJamie]

Caught Marathon Man. Thought it was alright.

[Nathan]

Caught Marathon Man. Thought it was alright.

Just alright??

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[FilmNerdJamie]

Scariest moment was that ball bouncing back at Roy Scheider from the darkness and everything with the Holocaust survivors stalking Sir Olivier.

But it really didn't do much for me. The notion of the "Jewish revenge fantasy" was read way more into the material than was there, in my (dumb ass) viewing. One uses that phrase and I think The Boys from Brazil and Munich.

[Captain Russ]

I watched as Luc Besson failed categorically to bring to screen more enjoyable and bizarre Francophilic insanity by hiring children/plastic toys to be adults with chemistry.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets has so many weird things that are visually stunning but it is all ultimately a beautiful backdrop to a high school play.

Dane Dehaan, who can be good, turns in a Baby Keanu performance. It's frightening how close he gets to emulating Johnny Utah's inflections here it becomes its own source of entertainment in that ironic hipster prick sort of way.

Cara Delvegne is just an anomaly. It's as though in place of person, there is a complete void for the first two acts. She comes around much later, but is still constantly undermined by being so damned young.

The entire film hinges on their chemistry, and that is where it just crumbles immediately. The characters of Valerian and Laureline as in the comic have a rivalry of sorts but it barely functions as a mask for their genuine care for one another. The film gets it pretty wrong, but it could have probably found its footing with a more charismatic duo that were out of diapers and wearing full-blown pants.

That said, it is a gorgeous looking film with interesting concepts that just loses steam after the marketplace sequence in the early goings. It's a shame, as if Besson put as much care into the story as he did with the world, then it would be somewhere in the ballpark of Fifth Element, but instead ends up being an interesting albeit failed sci-fi/ fantasy romp.

[Matt]

HIDDEN FIGURES

A very well done TV movie. It's nothing special as a piece of cinema, it's simply a great story very well told and acted.

[Abraham Smashington]

I watched as Luc Besson failed categorically to bring to screen more enjoyable and bizarre Francophilic insanity by hiring children/plastic toys to be adults with chemistry.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets has so many weird things that are visually stunning but it is all ultimately a beautiful backdrop to a high school play.

Dane Dehaan, who can be good, turns in a Baby Keanu performance. It's frightening how close he gets to emulating Johnny Utah's inflections here it becomes its own source of entertainment in that ironic hipster prick sort of way.

Cara Delvegne is just an anomaly. It's as though in place of person, there is a complete void for the first two acts. She comes around much later, but is still constantly undermined by being so damned young.

The entire film hinges on their chemistry, and that is where it just crumbles immediately. The characters of Valerian and Laureline as in the comic have a rivalry of sorts but it barely functions as a mask for their genuine care for one another. The film gets it pretty wrong, but it could have probably found its footing with a more charismatic duo that were out of diapers and wearing full-blown pants.

That said, it is a gorgeous looking film with interesting concepts that just loses steam after the marketplace sequence in the early goings. It's a shame, as if Besson put as much care into the story as he did with the world, then it would be somewhere in the ballpark of Fifth Element, but instead ends up being an interesting albeit failed sci-fi/ fantasy romp.

Better or worse than Jupiter Ascending. And did you like Jupiter Ascending?

[Captain Russ]

Comparable in some ways, at least in the pros/cons of visual spectacle trumping character/story, but beyond that it is more weird sci-fi than space opera.

I couldn't make it through the entirety of Jupiter Ascending. I just couldn't do it.

[BillyG]

Those Space-Goyles were rad.