What Emmanuelle Movie Did You Just Watch?

[Martin]

TF4 is in no way worse than TF2. NO WAY.

Time will tell, but this movie would have greatly benefited from Shia, his parents, and Megan Fox. And apeshit Turturro.

The only redeeming point of TF4 are the Dinobots. who are in there 5 minutes. At the end.

Hell, it's a close fight. The CIA crew is nearly as bad as the racist bots.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Hercules was a fucking B-movie blast.

[Martin]

I was sorely dissapoint to learn that it wasn't about the 12 Task of Hercules, as it's like a prologue or whatever (DESPITE THE TRAILER BEING FULL OF THAT!).

Looks to me like the average The Rock is a Warrior Movie.

[FilmNerdJamie]

It is... until the third act where they back-peddle and play the "Have Your Cake & Eat It Too" game by saying Hercules really is superhuman.

The "I AM HERCULES!" bit from the trailer (stupid as it appeared) is actually thrilling, fist-pumping and the best scene in the film.

[B_Metal]

Snowpiercer was fucking awesome. I need to watch The Postman, Snowpiercer, and Waterworld in an awesome triple feature.

YESSSSSSsss

It's pretty fucking close to being added to my list of: FUCK YEAH MOVIES

seriously

Oh it's a fuck yeah movie. I just meant it's not 100% without flaws.

Hercules was a fucking B-movie blast.

YESSSSSSSssss

I was sorely dissapoint to learn that it wasn't about the 12 Task of Hercules, as it's like a prologue or whatever (DESPITE THE TRAILER BEING FULL OF THAT!).

Looks to me like the average The Rock is a Warrior Movie.

Never use the word average and The Rock in the same sentence. EVER.

It is... until the third act where they back-peddle and play the "Have Your Cake & Eat It Too" game by saying Hercules really is superhuman.

The "I AM HERCULES!" bit from the trailer (stupid as it appeared) is actually thrilling, fist-pumping and the best scene in the film.

[Martin]

The fact that The Rock makes many average movies is a tragedy if you ask me. the man deserves to be the 21st centure A'anuld. I love that guy so much, but holy shit.

Speaking of which:

Fast 6

Not as good as Fast 5, but damn what a great actioner. And the cast is so good. I love me some Tyrese and The Rock and the others. And the after credit is aces. >If the Rock leaves this series I might be out though.

[FilmNerdJamie]

The fact that The Rock makes many average movies is a tragedy if you ask me. the man deserves to be the 21st centure A'anuld. I love that guy so much, but holy shit.

Bingo but Hercules is bad ass.

[Martin]

Oh I believe you, but it's a rental for me. My money is saved for Guardians.

[FilmNerdJamie]

Total rental, for sure.

[Captain Russ]

The temptation to not watch it was too much for me.

  Spoiler: things happen in that movie that kinda sorta fell off this truck prematurely that rhymes with Hey! Lunchables Free 

Expendables 3: The one where Wesley Snipes was not in it enough.

You'd think getting all the old guard together would produce some magic, and you'd be right.

Some of the best moments are small character interactions with the old crew.

The new guys and girl are all truly expendable jokes. Rousey should stick to making butch faces and crushing people in the octagon. It's more exciting than this, as she gets to do mostly fuck all here, which is a shame. Instead, she has to hang out with Martin's favorite Lutz.

Mel is fun, but not nearly ruthless enough. If it had been an R, I'm sure there'd be a torture scene bordering on him getting a euphoria boner while being punched in the stomach a whole lot.

Snipes and Arnold are the best parts. I fucking howled during some of their lines. It's a shame they weren't in it for long enough to make the thing totally engaging.

That's the problem with all of these movies. Stallone assembles an outstanding old man river wrecking crew and they are either sidelined or hamstrung by really lame plot contrivances or are shoved aside for boring fights where none of them are distinguishable or worse, play second fiddle to the most uncharismatic planks of fucking wood this side of Chris Klein in Rollerball or Harrison Ford at any time in his career when he did not have a fedora or laser gun in his hand.

What they should be is a celebration of all things fucked up and Reagancentric about the 80s, where the genre that spawned most of their careers had its genesis in baby oil, muscles, and weapons with the infinite ammo cheat enabled.

It's toothless for the most part. Not even a shoulder dislocation happens these days without a fucking medical crew on standby. I remember a time when all you needed was a solid wall and cocaine and you became your own EMT.

They just don't make 'em like they used to, and that's what hurts the most.

[B_Metal]

The temptation to not watch it was too much for me.

  Spoiler: things happen in that movie that kinda sorta fell off this truck prematurely that rhymes with Hey! Lunchables Free 

Expendables 3: The one where Wesley Snipes was not in it enough.

You'd think getting all the old guard together would produce some magic, and you'd be right.

Some of the best moments are small character interactions with the old crew.

The new guys and girl are all truly expendable jokes. Rousey should stick to making butch faces and crushing people in the octagon. It's more exciting than this, as she gets to do mostly fuck all here, which is a shame. Instead, she has to hang out with Martin's favorite Lutz.

Mel is fun, but not nearly ruthless enough. If it had been an R, I'm sure there'd be a torture scene bordering on him getting a euphoria boner while being punched in the stomach a whole lot.

Snipes and Arnold are the best parts. I fucking howled during some of their lines. It's a shame they weren't in it for long enough to make the thing totally engaging.

That's the problem with all of these movies. Stallone assembles an outstanding old man river wrecking crew and they are either sidelined or hamstrung by really lame plot contrivances or are shoved aside for boring fights where none of them are distinguishable or worse, play second fiddle to the most uncharismatic planks of fucking wood this side of Chris Klein in Rollerball or Harrison Ford at any time in his career when he did not have a fedora or laser gun in his hand.

What they should be is a celebration of all things fucked up and Reagancentric about the 80s, where the genre that spawned most of their careers had its genesis in baby oil, muscles, and weapons with the infinite ammo cheat enabled.

It's toothless for the most part. Not even a shoulder dislocation happens these days without a fucking medical crew on standby. I remember a time when all you needed was a solid wall and cocaine and you became your own EMT.

They just don't make 'em like they used to, and that's what hurts the most.

In total agreement. Mel was legit though, just could have been more so.

[Matt]

OK, I've had some time in the hospital to catch up on some movies that I've meant to see.

WORLD WAR Z:
I'm not sure if it was lowered expectations or something, but I actually kinda liked this. It was nice and intense from beginning to end with some decent set pieces. I watched it on my Surface, so the 'bad special effects' weren't so bad.

UNITED 93:
Simply excellent. Riveting and authentic feeling. This is probably Greengrass' best film.

THE GREY:
Much more existential than I was expecting. Grillo's character, in particular, hit a particularly strong note with me in his 'I'm ready to die now' speech along the river. Really solid stuff, and the abrupt ending didn't bother me. I can see how it would piss some people off to not see the battle, but it worked for me. The story was thematically over at that point. Very solid film.

Think I might watch ZULU next.

[Martin]

United 93 is awesome. I'll never watch it again.

[Matt]

Other movies that I've watched recently:

FLIGHT: Decent. Better than I expected with some really strong acting from everyone involved, especially Denzel. I appreciated that the film followed through with a proper ending. The crash was pretty damned exciting to watch, also.

THE GREAT GATSBY: Very good. All of the modern elements in it were jarring at first, but they also helped give the film a pseudo-timelessness that actually made it even stronger. Solidly acted from everyone involved.

THE BUTLER: Heavy handed tripe. If you're going to cover the civil rights era, then cover it. Don't slip it in there as a sideplot to another story. Also, don't canonize Democrats and domonize Republicans (especially Nixon) just because 'Hollywood'. Everyone did something good and bad along the way. Fucking ridiculous.

[B_Metal]

I want a spinoff of John Goodman's character from flight.