Wherein I watch TWILIGHT

[B_Metal]

I'm so glad I don't know what the fuck any of you are talking about. Also Ed is waging a jihad against fun.

[gravedigger]

So my wife decided she wanted to watch this too so I didn't liveblog because she'd think that's just weird.

If I'm being honest I have to say that it wasn't good but it actually wasn't as bad as I was expecting. I really liked the scenery (Pacific Northwest FTW) and Stewart is cute. But pretty much all of the mythology around the vampires is laughably bad. The "we sparkle in the sun and we don't like it" shit is so maddeningly stupid. They kick it in Washington because it's overcast all the time. On sunny days the vampires go on "vacation". Oh, and the "dad" of the family is literally Dr. Acula. All his "kids" are patients who had terminal diseases. Same with his wife.

The only cool thing, and this could have been really cool had the series not been aimed squarely at pre-teen girls and lonely abused housewives, is that the way to kill the vampires is to dismember them and burn the parts. The only death in the movie is relegated to the out-of-focus background while Bella moans in agony(arousal?) in the foreground.

It's ridiculous that this franchise is so popular but the really disconcerting thing is how all these chicks love Edward. Throughout the entire movie he's shown as nothing but a super creepy menacing stalker. He can't go five minutes without saying he's one sniff away from draining her blood and how he's totally dangerous. And Bella eats it up every time. It's like instant battered wife syndrome. So basically I guess this puts me on Team Jacob.

[B_Metal]

So my wife decided she wanted to watch this too so I didn't liveblog because she'd think that's just weird.

If I'm being honest I have to say that it wasn't good but it actually wasn't as bad as I was expecting. I really liked the scenery (Pacific Northwest FTW) and Stewart is cute. But pretty much all of the mythology around the vampires is laughably bad. The "we sparkle in the sun and we don't like it" shit is so maddeningly stupid. They kick it in Washington because it's overcast all the time. On sunny days the vampires go on "vacation". Oh, and the "dad" of the family is literally Dr. Acula. All his "kids" are patients who had terminal diseases. Same with his wife.

The only cool thing, and this could have been really cool had the series not been aimed squarely at pre-teen girls and lonely abused housewives, is that the way to kill the vampires is to dismember them and burn the parts. The only death in the movie is relegated to the out-of-focus background while Bella moans in agony(arousal?) in the foreground.

It's ridiculous that this franchise is so popular but the really disconcerting this is how all these chicks love Edward. Throughout the entire movie he's shown as nothing but a super creepy menacing stalker. He can't go five minutes without saying he's one sniff away from draining her blood and how he's totally dangerous. And Bella eats it up every time. It's like instant battered wife syndrome. So basically I guess this puts me on Team Homo.

Thanks for biting the bullet gd.

[BillyG]

http://www.collider.com/2010/06/28/d...-saga-eclipse/

When the hell did David Slade become Tony Soprano?

[Abraham Smashington]

That's fucking creepy. he totally looks like him