The Santa Claus Book

[PHEDG]

Anyone read this during Christmas when you were a kid. My Mom bought this for my brother and I to quell some of our imaginative questions we would ask about Santa stuff which she couldn't possibly come up with answers for. Aw memories! I remember the one year I wrote a letter for Santa asking for hair clippings from his beard and reindeer. I needed scientific proof it was he who had visited!

[Abraham Smashington]

Santa has urine in his beard.

[Ed Hocken]

Uh, I don't think that's urine.

[Timothy225]

Santa always throws the best Christmas Parties. FACT.

[Abraham Smashington]

Santa is also an alcoholic.

[Timothy225]

Would explain the red nose.

[V]

Probably gay, too...

[Ed Hocken]

Mrs. Claus does seem to be a beard.

[Bdubbs2010]

Oh, Billy...

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[PHEDG]

Santa is so much man that his beard has testosterone stains. But you wouldn't know anything about those, Rob.

[Ed Hocken]

Testosterone stains? Uh, haven't heard that slang before.

Hey, it's all the same under the black light.

[Abraham Smashington]

Santa is so much man that his beard has testosterone stains. But you wouldn't know anything about those, Rob.

True. I don't suck cock.

[PHEDG]

How did you translate testosterone into jizz? Biologically they are hardly similar.

[Abraham Smashington]

[PHEDG]

Correct, that is the width and length of your wang.